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#1 The Dude

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 06:34 PM

Twilight
[hide=plot]Bella Swan has always been a little bit different. Never one to run with the crowd, Bella never cared about fitting in with the trendy, plastic girls at her Phoenix, Arizona high school. When her mother remarried and Bella chooses to live with her father in the rainy little town of Forks, Washington, she didn't expect much of anything to change. But things do change when she meets the mysterious and dazzlingly beautiful Edward Cullen. For Edward is nothing like any boy she's ever met. He's nothing like anyone she's ever met, period. He's intelligent and witty, and he seems to see straight into her soul. In no time at all, they are swept up in a passionate and decidedly unorthodox romance - unorthodox because Edward really isn't like the other boys. He can run faster than a mountain lion. He can stop a moving car with his bare hands. Oh, and he hasn't aged since 1918. Like all vampires, he's immortal. That's right - vampire. But he doesn't have fangs - that's just in the movies. And he doesn't drink human blood, though Edward and his family are unique among vampires in that lifestyle choice. To Edward, Bella is that thing he has waited 90 years for - a soul mate. But the closer they get, the more Edward must struggle to resist the primal pull of her scent, which could send him into an uncontrollable frenzy. Somehow or other, they will have to manage their unmanageable love. But when unexpected visitors come to town and realize that there is a human among them Edward must fight to save Bella? A modern, visual, and visceral Romeo and Juliet story of the ultimate forbidden love affair - between vampire and mortal.  Written by http://www.summit-ent.com/

Isabella Swan moves to gloomy Forks to live with her father. As she starts her junior year in high school she becomes fascinated by Edward Cullen who holds a dark secret which is only known by his family. Edward falls in love with Bella as well but knows the further they progress in their relationship the more he is putting Bella and those close to her at risk. Edward warns Bella that she should leave him but she refuses to listen and to understand why he is saying this. Bella learns his secret. He is a vampire, however she is not afraid of his blood-thirsty needs and the fact he could kill her at any moment. Bella is afraid of losing him, the love of her life. The thrill begins when a new vampire finds it a challenge to hunt Bella down for her irresistible blood. The game is on and James will not stop until she is killed. Written by courtney

Bella Swan is a clumsy, kind hearted teenager with a knack for getting into trouble. Edward Cullen is an intelligent, good looking vampire who is trying to hide his secret. Against all odds, the two fall in love but will a pack of blood thirsty trackers and the disapproval of their family and friends separate them?[/hide]

Has anyone seen this
Spoiler
movie? Perhaps
Spoiler
the worst movie of last year?
The acting was a void bridging seemingly forgotten lines, shivering lips, and rapist staring eyes (the vampire dude). Yeah, I saw Twilight. Dragged you might say, by a gaggle of girls, and a hint of curiosity. It couldn't be as bad as I thought, could it? Yeah, it uh... was worse. Not just a boring first half leading me to believe this is a mystery story; but an action-filled last half that slapped my expectations in the face.
The vampires had special traits; which was like the only cool thing. Because it reminded me of a video game. Uhm, Legacy of Kain. Obviously, this is not LoK; it's kiddy to hell. And perverse to boot. This 17-year-old-looking-actually-really-damn-old vampire falling in love and stalking (breaking into her room and watching her sleep for fuck sakes) with a 17 year old girl. Pedophil- hey but there's a vampire who's good at tracking, and someone who can read the future. Uh, no Dudesoft, that's just not good enough. I couldn't get over how hideous this movie was. The whole time watching it, my mind was so repulsed that people around me were ENJOYING it. There were timely laughs and applause. People were enjoying this film. It was worse than Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone.
Another thing that was odd, but I suppose to be expected, was that little kids were brought out to see this flick. While
Spoiler
.

There was a tiny flicker of enjoyment to be had from this film. See, when I got to my parent's home (visiting my parents when I saw this) my folks asked how it was. I said obediantly, "oh, it was awesome! Yeah, the vampires were cool, and just like everything!" and they sighed relief as they had apparently already bought tickets for that same night!
Not an hour later after leaving, they came back; having walked out on it. :)
"Chill" -Gov'ner Arnold Schwarzenegger

#2 Dale Gobbler

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 06:44 PM

The only thing good that came out of this is youtube videos of people defending the movie. hhaahahh.


v:and fan girls

#3 big ass skelly

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 06:45 PM

[dohtml]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.c...></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.c...upQ&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>[/dohtml]

#4 Mongoloid

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 07:50 PM

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does anything happen in that video mark because i wont watch 9 minutes of a stupid fat girl cumming on herself over twilight
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#5 Bonehead

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 07:55 PM

AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Man I feel like a bad person but listening to her doing Darth Vader impression at 30
and then squealing like a pig at 52 just made my year. This is seriously the best thing
I've seen for a long time.

#6 Rajew

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 08:04 PM

I thought that the movie was really really funny. So did three of the people I was with.  The last one was mad at us for laughing throughout the entire movie :(
don't mind me, just postin' after a few brewskies

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#7 YourHero

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 08:18 PM

im pretty sure she was just playing it up... like.. a lot

1.33 = hilarious either way.

sometimes, you need to quote yourself to feel important.


#8 headphonics

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 08:23 PM

ohhh bugger

#9 big ass skelly

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 08:53 PM

There are lots of twilight trailer reaction vids... I guess it's the new 2 girls 1 cup

#10 Strangeluv

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 09:12 PM

Oh my god Mark oh my god

Jesus christ that video

#11 pburn

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 10:27 PM

http://www.twilightmoms.com/
heh

Yeah Twilight has consumed my peers it is awful. I try to reason with them but they keep telling me there is "more to the story".
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#12 Farren

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Posted 05 January 2009 - 10:58 PM

[dohtml]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.c...></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.c...3mg&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>[/dohtml]

ahaha none of these people are remotely memorable except for maybe SECOND BLACK GUY ON HOUSE?
DEUCE: MEETING THE URINE UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL AND REALIZING IT'S JUST LIKE ME AND MY PREJUDICES  THIS WHOLE TIME WERE COMPLETELY FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF PTTTTHTHTHH GOD IT'S EVERYWHERE<br />DEUCE: FUCK THIS TASTES LIKE PISS<br />PANTS: WHERE IT SHOULD TASTE LIKE COTTON CANDY OR PICKLES<br />DEUCE: OR AT LEAST LIKE URINE NOT PISS

#13 fatty

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 12:54 AM

god i know a girl that hates santa because she didn't bring her a passionate vampire like edward

#14 Dale Gobbler

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 01:00 AM

There's this one youtube video with a red haired girl talking about the movie and how she spent $30 buying the hard cover book and she doesn't even read.

"All you haters and everyone that  um hates twilight, that's your opinion.  You suck.  omg you suck so much."

something like that.

#15 The Dude

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 05:01 AM

Maaaaan I didn't know what to expect by starting this... that video Mark... It was so funny and horrible at the same time that I couldn't finish. :( I didn't know it was this bad. This is terrible people. How can we fix this? How can we save these teens from Twilight?
"Chill" -Gov'ner Arnold Schwarzenegger

#16 Sapsuker

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 05:10 AM

the thing that makes twilight so fucking bad is that it could actually have had a small amount of potential if the author wasn't writing down her retarded wet dream

like imagine if you were a girl that fell in love with a real vampire. like, say, an anne rice vampire. one that actually sucks human blood and can die in sunlight. and then you have to fight your one true love to the death...or undeath... this sounds pretty shitty and generic but it's at least 1000 times better than the teeny bopper twilight shit. VAGETERIAN VAMPIRS

yeah fuck that book and fuck this movie even more. i hear the actor fo r the lead vampire hates his role and the book and wants out

#17 The Dude

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 05:24 AM

yeah fuck that book and fuck this movie even more. i hear the actor fo r the lead vampire hates his role and the book and wants out


Haha, maybe that's why he always looked so venomous in the film. Seriously, if you ever murder your eyes and watch it, that guy's character is always glaring. It was like about how he wanted to suck her blood or whatever, but like, he looked really pissed and creepy 95% of the time. Now it makes sense! :fogetmmh:
"Chill" -Gov'ner Arnold Schwarzenegger

#18 Mamamack

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 05:26 AM

My two sisters, aged 14 and 18, seemed to enjoy the books so I thought hey, what could it hurt? I read all four books and I wound up having to keep earplugs in my ears because the angsty teenage crap was causing my gray matter to melt and I feared it would leak out through my ear canals. I figured we could go see this movie and get some sort of entertainment out of it so off we went.

Good vampire suspense movie + Sesame Street +emo-goth teenage drama = Twilight. Seriously. I wanted to cry at how horribly cheesy it was but, considering the source material, what else could I have asked for? I enjoy laughing at movies that are deliberately funny, but laughing at movies that take themselves way too seriously just makes me feel depressed. Perhaps if the lead characters had broken out into song and dance. . . Nope, not even that would have made me laugh.

Also, what the hell kind of vampire
Spoiler

Check it out! I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year!

#19 Christophomicus

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 12:18 PM

ahaha, at 3:20 on mark's video she's like "AHH! THE MEADOW" and it sounds like she seriously died inside of happiness

hahahahaha holy shit. that is the best/worst video I've seen in sooooooo long

#20 Massy2k6

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Posted 06 January 2009 - 12:39 PM

I cant stand this movie and just don’t understand why its so popular especially amongst the young ladies, I just don’t get it... there are some great vampire movies out there and Twilight doesn’t even come close, I can normally enjoy most movies but this one was just terrible.

One of the worst things about this movie for me was
Spoiler


p.s. That video from mark off the Twilight fan girl made me laugh.. alot, see I just dont get it.

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