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hooooooooooooly shit that was terrible


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#1 headphonics

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 07:33 AM

i've come to realize that i am . . . how you say . . . appreciative of the finer things in cinema.  actually no i'm not at all, i like really awful shit.  i love bad movies.  let's fucking talk about bad movies or something.  remember when we all watched overdrawn at the memory bank?  that was great.  let's all pick some really hideously awful bad movies to watch and perhaps are smug, patronizing love for these dogshit movies will bring us just a little bit closer together.  or maybe it won't i don't care if we do that!!  tell me about movies i'd like for these reasons though.  not BAD BAD ones but funny ones.  bad bad ones are just boring.

currently downloading: wicker man.  rowain told me a while ago i should watch this movie so i'm going to do that.

#2 headphonics

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 09:21 AM

i knew it was only a matter of time. . . :fogetnah:


actually i probably really should watch that movie!  you guys keep whoring out that KRUG scene though and i don't really get whats so special about it but it's a boll flick so it's definitely worth checking out.  was that postal movie any good?

#3 bonzi_buddy

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 09:37 AM

Con Air starring Nicholas Cage (nicholas cage... is nicholas cage. he can't act anybody else.) is worth watching, at least for the ending. after recovering a insulin injection for his black escaper prisoner - friend from a battlefield between swat and prisoners, nicholas cage goes on a rampage! the ending and the fate of the movie's anagonist is one of the most ridicilous one i have ever seen.
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i don't know if it's really that good. see it for yourself? that is up to you, dear watcher, to decice in the next exciting episode of survivor: bengali . . .

#4 Rowain

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:23 AM

Gat damn Wicker Man is a funny movie, though the funniest moments have been montaged on youtube. It's just such an aimless, incoherant wreck filled with Nick Cage's classically bad acting.

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#5 xanque

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:25 AM

I am in love with The Core.  It's one of my favorite movies ever.  But I didn't think it was terrible, yet everyone else did.  It was just that it kept trying so hard to be a good movie, yet kept screwing up... like an adorable kid or something.
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#6 Bonehead

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:44 AM

I really like Ice Pirates and I'm not proud of it at all lol. It's a really shitty ripoff of Star Wars, but there's something about the unicorn planet in it that makes my whole body tingle with pleasure oh and the black dude getting a giant white afro in the end is also great. SEE IT!



Another bad movie (which I don't like though) is Nick Fury with David Hasselhoff. That's probably the worst flick I've ever seen.

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Lol I kinda enjoyed The Core as well. It's exactly what you need a friday evening with friends while drinking beer and eating shitty food while not paying to much attention to the movie.

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I'd check out wicker man as well but I really really really can't stand Nicholas Cage. He's a fucking crybaby.

#7 Shinan

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:58 AM

The Core is so great. As is Dungeon Siege. Speaking of Postal I think it was a little too good to be a genuinely bad movie. (although it was still pretty bad, just not as bad)

Another movie I recommend is Cyborg 3 - The Recycler.

Also The Stuff.

Actually just visit http://www.badmovies.org for all your bad movie needs. I've found some glorious gems on that page.
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#8 Bonehead

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 11:02 AM

Another movie I recommend is Cyborg 3 - The Recycler.

Ahahaha, that's probably the best movie title I've ever seen lol.

Man I forgot the title of this one movie I was meaning to rent for ages. It was a hack-n-slash movie about a terminator dog with a skeleton made of steel that killed everything in its way. Anybody recognises the plot?

#9 big ass skelly

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 01:58 PM

I like the original wicker man but yeah the nick cage one looks hilarious. Nicholas Cage has never been in a good movie.

Also bad films I'm pretty partial to Kull the Conqueror and Hawk the Slayer

#10 headphonics

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 02:11 PM

i remember liking adaptation.  i was half paying attention to weatherman one time when it was on and it seemed okay.  i liked the part where people kept throwing mcdonald's hot apple pies at him

#11 headphonics

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 02:11 PM

kull the conquerer rules also

#12 Bonehead

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 02:17 PM

i remember liking adaptation.  i was half paying attention to weatherman one time when it was on and it seemed okay.  i liked the part where people kept throwing mcdonald's hot apple pies at him

Doh! Forgot about that one. That movie's actually good and probably because Cage's supposed to be a crybaby in it :P

#13 Artis Leon Ivey Jr

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 02:21 PM

don't watch in the name of the king unless you have a fastforward button. there are some genuinely funny horrible moments in it but the fight sequences are SO GODDAM LONG. I mean we LEFT despite laughing half the movie because we couldn't watch. there's also some really bad bollywood movies but you probably don't want to do that.

my friend jon has a massive collection of bad horror movies, but idk if you're interested in that. if you are I can just ask, but everyone knows the classics, manos the hand of the fate, plan 9 from outer space, leonard part 6, etc.

oh one movie he just DOES NOT SHUT UP ABOUT: Cabin Fever. he loves that movie. like it is his number 1 favorite SO BAD ITS BRILLIANT YOU MUST WATCH IT FOREVER movie.

also wicker man duh although I've heard you can watch the youtube clips. which reminds me actually!

http://www.avclub.co...e&submit=Search

the av club does a regular special called I WATCHED THIS ON PURPOSE. you might use that as a good shooting off point.
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#14 headphonics

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 02:36 PM

aaaaaaaa cabin fever.  yo the part where he's fingering her and you just hear SQUISHING noises and his hand comes up covered in core.  the movie was fucking brilliant

#15 Roman

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:36 PM

my roommate and I are actually watching a bollywood movie right now and it's very confusing.  the tone of each scene is drastically different from the last.  it started with this dude and this girl singing to each other in the desert, then the girl was on stage and the guy was just around somewhere, then he was yelling at her at a cafe, now they're playing some kind of sport?  oh it's rugby.  oh wait this has to be a comedy.  i think.  it's really funny. 

#16 Artis Leon Ivey Jr

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:44 PM

the reason the king of the krug thing bothers me (and I'd guess panda too) is like I WAS ON THAT TIP like months ago, no one mentions it and now you go to the clip and all the comments are those gross people who follow whatever chef watches. all of them.

you can read that as some weird e-jealousy or something but in reality I kind of hate it when shit becomes MEMES and the fact that chef can't even view a video with a bunch of reject ycs posters commenting on it and then I see it namedropped in a fyad-lite like three weeks is really fucking annoying

and it's clear that's what happening because if you saw the movie you'd know that's not even the best scene in it. I mean there's a scene where Ron Perlman slides down a zipline and he goes WHOOOOOA but he's like OFFKEY or something. but CHEF saw it so now...guass its a thing. they like king of the krug because chef likes it and not in a "oh a guy saw something funny" way like bort et al but CHEF ITS CHEFBOYARDEE HE SAW IT!!!TWITTER

oh shit here it is: it's at like 1:30 ahahah his goddam mouth.
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#17 big ass skelly

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:54 PM

I saw that king of the krug video linked on WOW FORUMS like 3 or 4 times before I quit 4 months ago

#18 esp

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 04:27 PM

ahahaahaha jason statham + dungeon siege = movie?? whaaat
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#19 Rowain

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 05:15 PM

Also I know you said no BAD BAD movies, but Disaster Movie man. Like all those Friedberg/Seltzer _____ Movie movies are bad, but I downloaded Disaster Movie awhile back and it takes the cake. It's worth watching just to see how AWFUL comedy writers can be and still get project funding and a major cinema release. It's also only like 65 minutes long.

Like the entire movie is 2-3 minute SPOOFS of completely random movies/tv shows/COMMERCIALS that aren't even connected. Like a guy will be talking to Batman, and Batman gets squished by a cow, and the guy will just turn around and see Iron Man who in turn announces I'M IRONMAN in case you didn't KNOW it was him. This one scene sticks out in my head where one character is at this party and he sees a guy asleep on a couch. And then the serial killer from No Country for Old Men comes up and the first character says LETS PAINT THE SLEEPING DUDES FACE and the killer says I HAVE A BETTER IDEA or something and uses that air cannister he had in the movie to kill the sleeping guy. And that's the fucking joke. That's their No Country for Old Men satire.

You should watch Disaster Movie!!!!!!!!

It's also funny because like half the cast are ex-MadTV actors.
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#20 Wash Cycle

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Posted 25 April 2009 - 05:59 PM

excalibur is one of the most genuinely awful movies I have ever seen in my life

I'm talking about the one from the 80s thats like 3 hours long. it is so fucking god awful



you only need to see the intro to get it. although there is this scene where merlin is trippin out pretty hard that is really amusing but the rest is just awful

yeah merlin


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